Just because our pain isn’t as big or obvious as someone else’s, it doesn’t mean we are not suffering just as much.
Take paper cuts for example. As a teacher, I am always ending up with paper cuts on a daily basis, from handing out worksheets to putting things up on display. Paper cuts happen so easily and are so small, it’s often hard to detect them from afar, but in my opinion they are so painful! They are the worse! They bleed like crazy and sting so much, especially when hand sanitiser gets into them!
My point is, paper cuts are hardly noticeable compared to other injuries, such as a broken arm, but that’s not to say they don’t cause as much pain or discomfort. Within our Christian life, we all go through times when we suffer and feel pained. It’s not always the big, obvious reasons of suffering, but the smaller things we carry with us. From the outside it is easy to appear whole, but inside we could be experiencing a completely different story.
Therefore, we should not compare our trials to one another, thinking “I’m suffering way more than them”, or equally “Why am I complaining, I don’t have it as bad as them”. We each have a limit, a threshold to how much we can endure. Our emotions of suffering are just as valid, not measured across a scale of who has it worse. Comparison of suffering only leads to further sorrow.
We are free to feel and express our pain before God in a way that honours Him – not because our pain is comparable to another, but because God has gifted us with the ability to feel those emotions. The idea of suffering does not sound at all appealing. However, it is during these times where we realise just how much we need God in our lives. Suffering actually has the reverse of what we presume, and is a good thing for us to endure. At the time, it obviously does not feel ‘good’ but upon reflection, we are able to see just how much God’s constant love and presence, strengthens and supports us during our time of suffering, and it also helps us to focus more on Him. In Psalm 119:71, it acknowledges just this notion; “My suffering was good for me, for it taught me to pay attention to your decrees.” Through our seasons of suffering, God uses these experiences to shape and mould us into better people; “I have refined you, but not as silver is refined. Rather, I have refined you in the furnace of suffering.”, Isaiah 48:10. This verse explains how through our suffering, God can remove our impurities that have been causing us pain. God is compassionate and understands our distress and pain when we are struggling, and will always be with us during such times.
“Since he himself has gone through suffering and testing, he is able to help us when we are being tested.”
Hebrews 2:18
Sometimes when we are suffering, we may feel ashamed or too broken to share our distress, and instead choose to suffer alone in silence. Rather than hiding behind closed doors, where no-one can hear us, lets choose to suffer together in community. Instead of comparing our suffering to each other, lets be there for one another, when we need each other most.
“Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep.”
Romans 12:15
“If one part suffers, all the parts suffer with it, and if one part is honoured, all the parts are glad.”
1 Corinthians 12:26
Pain and suffering is something everyone can relate to at one time or another. Therefore, we should strive to lead with compassion instead of judgement, as we are instructed in Luke 6:36, to “be compassionate, just as your Father is compassionate.” Empathy is not a finite resource and love doesn’t need to be rationed!
“What if we agreed not to evaluate, dissect, tally and rank each other’s pain right now? What if we opt out of the hardship Olympics and make a pact to lead with compassion instead?”
Erica Layne
God Bless 🙂 x
STEADFAST 